To Father and My Letters Ümit Dağcı

First name and last name are two different personalities. The name belongs to you, the surname is the life that comes from your genes. People breathe freely when they learn to live in the totality of two names. But if a person like me lives in a war between his first name and last name, he just stands between being or not being at all, he is out of breath and he just writes. Although her writings -according to some- become meaningless, she writes. To be able to take a tiny breath… “Farewell is approaching. We'll say goodbye in a little while. This farewell will not be a new beginning. There is... no end, and there will be no end. There will be a huge gap, I will not be able to fit into the gap. No matter what I write that won't be enough, I'll be halfway through before I say goodbye. I'm gonna be late because I can't write. I'll be halfway through my literature, which is not enough to describe my feelings. If I wrote the whole letter in capital letters, I would be halfway through because I didn't have a voice. My deficiency; it will also make my loneliness incomplete, I will stay lack in my incompleted loneliness. My death... My death will be incomplete. Do you know what you've done to me?” GOODBYE DAD…

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